Cancer and COVID-19 Make Getting Organized Even More Important
Hester Hill Schnipper, LICSW, OSW-C Program Manager Emeritus, Oncology, Social Work
JULY 09, 2020
Most people prefer not to think about necessary preparations to ease matters if they become very ill or die. It always surprised me how many people don't have wills and have not even had conversations with their families about where important documents are kept. My adult daughters tease me about how they have known, since they were 6 or 7, where the notebook titled "Important Information" was stored. Fortunately, they never had to use it or point out its location to a relative, but their knowing was part of my caring for them. Unless you want to leave more money than necessary to the government and a mess for your family, it is vital to spend a little time getting organized.
As an aside, wills don't have to be complicated unless you have a lot of resources, own your own business, or have complicated legal arrangements in your personal life. It is possible to download one or secure simple legal services online. Wills are important for everyone, but, if you have children, they are absolutely vital. Adult children will be helped by existing legal documents, but dependent children need you to make responsible decisions for their care if you cannot provide it.
Today I am not writing about difficult end-of-life decisions, thinking about DNR orders or whether you would want to be put on a ventilator if very ill. Those are painful, thoughtful, layered conversations that need to be had with your closest family members or dear friends. You need to identify someone as your health care proxy who can carry out those wishes if you can't express them. There are at least two excellent online resources for these discussions:
Both provide gentle guides to thinking about your values, priorities, and how you want to honor the last part of your life.
Reminder: making these plans and having these conversations do not have any power to make bad things happen. It is easy to be superstitious and prey to magical thinking, but not thinking about these issues will have serious negative implications for your family. As a bonus, you are likely to feel reassured and relieved once you have taken care of business and can go on with your life.
Today, I am thinking about the practical tasks, a job you can and should do by yourself. Since I first began to talk with patients about this issue, the world has changed. In addition to information about bank accounts or credit cards, we now need to consider our virtual worlds. If someone does not know your computer password, nothing will be easy.
Triage Cancer's Checklist for Getting Organized beautifully summarizes the tasks you should consider:
Whether you are trying to organize your finances, or you are starting to make estate planning decisions, it is important that you compile the information contained in this checklist, in addition to any other information that you feel is important.Some potential places to store these records include a fireproof safe in your home, a bank safe deposit box, or electronically in an online drive. One benefit to keeping a copy of these records online is that they are accessible from anywhere, which can be useful if you are traveling or if there is a natural disaster.
Wherever you decide to store these records, it is crucial that someone you trust knows where they are located and has access.
